Not even sure how I slept at all last night. Nope, not because of annoying bad sleeper child. I was so distraught yesterday (wow, isn't it great that I admitted twice in the past week that I had a sucky day).. see people, it is easy to actually admit to yourself and to others how you are really feeling some days. Try it. sometime. Then report back to me.
I notice that I start writing and then I go off on these random tangents. I think that is how I talk to friends too. Jumping from topic to topic. I would apologize for confusing you, but I am not going to. You'll just have to keep up.
Ok, so back to me not being sure how I even slept at all last night. I was drowning my day in blondie brownies that a friend had made for me, and chocolate chip cookies from another friend (and you call yourselves friends???) and so I actually think that my chocolate consumption ended up higher than my regular food consumption for the day. Those who know me know I am not a chocoholic. I rarely eat a candy bar. Would rather eat twizzlers, swedish fish, tootsie rolls, blah blah blah. So, with all that chocolate laced caffeine in my bloodstream, I am surprised I survived the night at all. I did stay up til 10PM in which I am typically already in my 3rd REM state. Yes, I am a loser. I go to sleep at 8 or 9, but remember I have to be up at 5 (at the latest) every damn day.
And just to ease your mind, I am watching Martian Mickey as I type. Well, I'm not.. but you get the idea. Shit, I just realized that baby is holding the kitten. Whoops. Not up for mom of the year, huh? And no, still haven't made a decision.
Going back to the genetics conversation from the other day. Recall, all my days run together so I don't remember exactly which day I talked aobut it and therefore cannot direct you back to it.
I am a control freak. It is genetic. I am learning that my tot is a control freak. It is genetic. I am quite concerned that it is rearing it's ugly head at the ripe old age of 2. I am quite convinced that her teenage years are not going to be pretty.
Below I will list some recent examples of her control freakishness (yes, I take great pride in making up my own words).
1. screaming from her crib this AM after I went in and told her to shut up (ish). "I do not want to go back to sleep" and then again, louder, "I DO NOT WANT TO GO BACK TO SLEEP MOMMY". (repeat 50 X)
2. While getting dressed yesterday, "I just weared this one. I just weared this clothes mommy. No wear this today".
3. No do my hair. No eat that. No get in car. No like this show. NO, NO, NO. Don't want to, Don't want to, DON'T WANT TO.
Guess I should be thankful that I do not have to worry about anyone pushing her around in her life. Although, I'd like to, at least a little bit. Why, because I am a control freak.
And in reference to why she wins- isn't there some saying that the loudest one wins? Or is it is last one standing? whichever.. clearly in my life it is her. And not me.
You may want to get an apartment for our boy and you when our girls are the ages 11,12,13,14,15,16,17,18.
Will miss you,