Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Tales of Nonsense

It is a damn good thing you can not hear things through the computer.  Trust me, it is sparing you.. although, it is quite entertaining and sad at the same time.  Mean, maybe?  But I've got to look at the bright side of this whole sleeping shitty-ness.

My angel girl is seriously screaming at the top of her lungs (while laying down- I can see on the video monitor). First she was taking roll call... mommy close her eyes and go nite nite, daddy close his eyes and go nite nite, brother close his eyes and go nite nite.. you get the point.  Then she moved on to screaming, I'M TIRED MOMMY. I'm tired.  I go close my eyes and go nite nite too, no crying.  Um, excuse me dear little one, how can you say no crying when you are SCREAMING at the top of your freakin tiny little lungs.  And then, for her final performance of the evening. My personal fav, let's call it the encore if you will.  She sang every single song I sing to her before bed, every single word, all at the top of her lungs, while crying. Twinkle, ABCD, Bah-Bah black sheep and you are my sunshine.  Bravo little one.  I am standing in applause.  What an excellent show you put on. You not only made mommy laugh til she cried (and actually the friend mommy was on the phone with too), you finally made yourself pass out.  27 minutes after I left the room.   Mazel Tov.

Did I tell you that my husband travels?  Well, he does.  However, this week he is home.  Unexpectedly, but home. I am squealing with delight for having the extra set of hands around.  Enter sarcasm. Oh, so speaking of.  Yesterday was a crazy day with the drs appt and skate night and rushing and schleping and annoying check out people and rain.  Did I mention it rained yesterday? So, I somehow happened to forget to fold the load of laundry in the dryer.  I just cannnot imagine how on earth I would forget such a fun and energy inspiring task. But, I did.

Well, this AM after I got 4 people dressed (myself included), dished out vitamins, starting inquiring about breakfast (s), made lunches, packed backpacks and knocked back my cup of coffee, I remembered the wrinkled mess that was waiting for me in the dryer.  I asked my dear loving hubby (since he is actually here) to be useful for a few minutes. All I said was, "Can you get them breakfast while I run upstairs to fold the laundry".   I grab the phone (because god forbid I am not connected to someone at the time of doing such a mundane household chore).  Head upstairs, dail phone, open dryer, fold sons brown sweatpants, reach into dryer to collect another article of fresh laundry, and then I hear "Can you come downstairs?  I need your help.  I just sliced my finger open tyring to cut a bagel". WTF??  Really?  Really?  It's not like I was out getting a massage, I was trying to fold a fucking load of laundry, but nooooooooooo.  I was needed. What else is new.
So, of course I hang up and run downstairs.

Problem #1.  I do not like to be interrupted on the phone. ever.
Problem #2.  I do not like being held up on crappy household chores when I finally decide (aka remember to do them).
Problem #3.  It seems as if that even when hubby is home, I still end up doing the morning routine myself- probably because I do it better and faster anyway.

K, I am not lying, but I went downstairs and found my hubby curled up on the couch like he just got his period. It's gushing and throbbing he says.  Do we have band aids?   Love him, love him to death (mostly for still loving me through this whole blogging catharsis situation I am going through).  On the plus side- all this nonsense makes me laugh. Otherwise I think I'd cry.


  1. Your husband and the band aid...I LOVE IT!!

    I too multi-task while performing menial chores - I try to watch DVR'd episodes of my BELOVED "The Daily Show" and then S-C-R-E-A-M at the little people when they climb on top of me like monkey's and ask me why things are funny???

    Sorry the two extra hangs aren't as helpful as you anticipated - I feel that too - Hubs def. muffed up my AM routine this week (I, of course, mean this in the NICEST POSSIBLE WAY:)

  2. Yes - my second set of hands also needs a lot of help while "helping." Plus he makes about 30% of the mess I clean up. At least they mean well?

    Also - can you record your video monitor? That would be a keeper.